For Jaden

October 25, 2008

3:38 pm

Dearest Jaden,

I’m right here outside the Operating Room where your mom was taken, more than an hour and a half ago. Im scared. Im scared for you and your mom. I wanted so much to be there by your mom’s side. So I could at least hold her hand. I know she’s scared too, but I can see how she’s trying to hide it, not because she doesn’t want me to see her real feelings but because she wants to be brave. She’ll be brave for you.

In a few hours, you’ll be here. I don’t know how long will it take for the doctors or the nurses allow me to see you but I sure am excited. I want to see you come out safe, I want to see your mom and hold her in my arms and tell her how much I love her. I love you both you and your mom, more than anything else in this world.

If I could trade places with your mom, I would, I don’t want to see her in pain, but that’s not possible. So all I can do is sit here and wait, and pray that you’ll both come out alright. Nothing can ease my fears right now but the sight of you and your mom. There are a thousand feelings I can’t even begin to describe right now and I wish they will all be replaced with the joy of seeing you for the first time, the relief of seeing your mom open her eyes and look for her son, our son.

She will be fine, you will be fine, she’ll look at you and her tired body will feel as though she never went under the knife. I will see her face light up once she sees you. And I will be standing there watching you both, eager to let your mom hold you for the very first time. This is all I hope for, and all I pray for.

I’ll be seeing you in a while. :)

Love,

Daddy